Pretty good, huh? Caveman Cocktail Franks! By the way, new photo friendly plates a gift from my friend Stacie, who coined the phrase fauxghetti to describe my zucchini noodles.
These are the cooking adventures of Jeff Nimoy, an LA writer who accidentally found what's called The Caveman Diet, also called The Paleo Diet. Basically, it's eating what the cavemen ate. The results have been staggering and people have been so fascinated, this blog was started to show exactly how and what Jeff eats! If you're new to the blog, please start with the earliest entry, "Entering The Cave," dated August 9, 2010, to get a clear understanding of what it's all about.
Friday, December 31, 2010
Caveman Cocktail Frank, anyone?
A New Year's Eve tradition for me involves making cocktail franks with Pillsbury croissant dough. But this year, I'm taking my organic hot dog (does have a little salt though), and baking it right into my nut bread! First experiment, so I made some that were completely dipped, and some that were stuck half way. Made my own hot mustard by combining water, mustard powder, crushed red pepper and lemon juice. Some organic sauerkraut, rinsed off to limit the salt content, as a garnish. Look:
Pretty good, huh? Caveman Cocktail Franks! By the way, new photo friendly plates a gift from my friend Stacie, who coined the phrase fauxghetti to describe my zucchini noodles.
Pretty good, huh? Caveman Cocktail Franks! By the way, new photo friendly plates a gift from my friend Stacie, who coined the phrase fauxghetti to describe my zucchini noodles.
Sunday, December 26, 2010
Paleo Pizza Kitchen: Grand Opening!
I'm REAL close on this one, folks. Paleo pizza! First, look, then, recipe:
I made my regular bread from ground brazil nuts, the most bread-like nut flour so far (almond probably still tastes the best, but brazil makes for the best consistency). Again, the recipe is (ALL INGREDIENTS, ALL ORGANIC, ALL THE TIME):
1 Cup Ground Brazil Nut Flour
1/4 Cup of Arrowroot
3 Tblsp of Olive Oil
3 eggs
Mix that all together and pour into a 9x13 parchment paper lined baking pan. Spread out evenly with hands or a spatula. Bake in 350 degree preheated oven for 10 minutes.
Take out of the oven, and spread a thin layer of tomato sauce over bread, leaving room on the sides (like a crust). Add toppings. Bake for another 10 minutes.
Remove from oven and sprinkle on Paleo Parmesan, and fresh basil. Cut into squares, and serve (we call square pieces of pizza in Brooklyn, Sicilian style, usually a thicker crust, but in this case, just convenient, if you have a round pan, go for it!).
Now for my toppings, I had two slices of leftover breaded eggplant from the last pizza experiment, so I put that on (pictured far left), but for this experiment, I put the sauce on top of it, but now that I've tasted it, I think all toppings should go on top (duh). Then I lightly sauteed some mushrooms and put that on a slice (pictured in the middle). Finally, I just went with the sauce for my last slice (far left).
Yes, it is cheese-less, but the paleo parmesan and the fresh basil really make it smell and taste like pizza! I think if I could find some organic mozzarella from a grass fed cow, it would be a pretty good mini-cheat to add on, but even without the cheese, this pizza IS DAMN GOOD! Let me repeat that little bit about grass-fed again. Listen up people, I'm sick of saying it, cows eat grass, please stop using cow products from corn-fed cows, it's BAD for you! And don't be fooled by advertising tricks on labels like "all-natural," and "fed an organic vegetarian diet." All that means is the corn and other grains they ate were organic. It has to say "organic" AND "grass-fed," and then you will know you are eating products from a happy and healthy moo-cow.
The eggplant was good, the mushrooms better, and I think the plain was the best (the mark of quality with any great pizza)! If I had some of that leftover Italian sausage, that would've been great too, but I finished off that bad boy the next night! I also sprinkled on some crushed red pepper, but no need for garlic powder, if you remember, the paleo parmesan has raw garlic in it already!
I am going to claim this experiment a success and declare the Paleo Pizza kitchen officially open. If I do a mini-cheat with some cheese I'll be sure to let you know. But when you're hungry, and only have a few ingredients around, go to your pantry and make a quick sauce with that jar of organic strained tomatoes I've told you about many times (you can look it up in the blog about Ten Condiments yourself, you lazy bastards), make a quick bread and paleo parmesan using the brazil nuts you have in the pantry right next to the strained tomatoes, and presto, in 20-30 minutes you have paleo pizza!
Hmm? What's that? You don;t have any of that crap in your pantry? Well, if you want to eat like a caveman, you better stock up the cave. Otherwise you'll be running to the store every friggin' time you want to eat. And you'll get real tired of being paleo if that happens. So stock up, prepare ahead, and plan/cook multiple meals at a time (like, if you make fauxghetti sauce, plan on three different meals including pizza with the leftovers, and freeze the rest for the future). Do all that, and you'll be as happy as a grass-fed moo-cow. Only instead of moo, you'll be happily saying, "Ugga-Bugga!"
I made my regular bread from ground brazil nuts, the most bread-like nut flour so far (almond probably still tastes the best, but brazil makes for the best consistency). Again, the recipe is (ALL INGREDIENTS, ALL ORGANIC, ALL THE TIME):
1 Cup Ground Brazil Nut Flour
1/4 Cup of Arrowroot
3 Tblsp of Olive Oil
3 eggs
Mix that all together and pour into a 9x13 parchment paper lined baking pan. Spread out evenly with hands or a spatula. Bake in 350 degree preheated oven for 10 minutes.
Take out of the oven, and spread a thin layer of tomato sauce over bread, leaving room on the sides (like a crust). Add toppings. Bake for another 10 minutes.
Remove from oven and sprinkle on Paleo Parmesan, and fresh basil. Cut into squares, and serve (we call square pieces of pizza in Brooklyn, Sicilian style, usually a thicker crust, but in this case, just convenient, if you have a round pan, go for it!).
Now for my toppings, I had two slices of leftover breaded eggplant from the last pizza experiment, so I put that on (pictured far left), but for this experiment, I put the sauce on top of it, but now that I've tasted it, I think all toppings should go on top (duh). Then I lightly sauteed some mushrooms and put that on a slice (pictured in the middle). Finally, I just went with the sauce for my last slice (far left).
Yes, it is cheese-less, but the paleo parmesan and the fresh basil really make it smell and taste like pizza! I think if I could find some organic mozzarella from a grass fed cow, it would be a pretty good mini-cheat to add on, but even without the cheese, this pizza IS DAMN GOOD! Let me repeat that little bit about grass-fed again. Listen up people, I'm sick of saying it, cows eat grass, please stop using cow products from corn-fed cows, it's BAD for you! And don't be fooled by advertising tricks on labels like "all-natural," and "fed an organic vegetarian diet." All that means is the corn and other grains they ate were organic. It has to say "organic" AND "grass-fed," and then you will know you are eating products from a happy and healthy moo-cow.
The eggplant was good, the mushrooms better, and I think the plain was the best (the mark of quality with any great pizza)! If I had some of that leftover Italian sausage, that would've been great too, but I finished off that bad boy the next night! I also sprinkled on some crushed red pepper, but no need for garlic powder, if you remember, the paleo parmesan has raw garlic in it already!
I am going to claim this experiment a success and declare the Paleo Pizza kitchen officially open. If I do a mini-cheat with some cheese I'll be sure to let you know. But when you're hungry, and only have a few ingredients around, go to your pantry and make a quick sauce with that jar of organic strained tomatoes I've told you about many times (you can look it up in the blog about Ten Condiments yourself, you lazy bastards), make a quick bread and paleo parmesan using the brazil nuts you have in the pantry right next to the strained tomatoes, and presto, in 20-30 minutes you have paleo pizza!
Hmm? What's that? You don;t have any of that crap in your pantry? Well, if you want to eat like a caveman, you better stock up the cave. Otherwise you'll be running to the store every friggin' time you want to eat. And you'll get real tired of being paleo if that happens. So stock up, prepare ahead, and plan/cook multiple meals at a time (like, if you make fauxghetti sauce, plan on three different meals including pizza with the leftovers, and freeze the rest for the future). Do all that, and you'll be as happy as a grass-fed moo-cow. Only instead of moo, you'll be happily saying, "Ugga-Bugga!"
Saturday, December 25, 2010
Pie is Cooling!
Bringing a caveman apple pie to my friend Heather's for Christmas Day dinner. Non-paleo meal, but at least dessert will be fit for a caveman!
Click here for recipe (crust had been improved since, will update again after New Years): Caveman Apple Pie!
Click here for recipe (crust had been improved since, will update again after New Years): Caveman Apple Pie!
Friday, December 24, 2010
Rigatoni! Plus, Garlic Bread Improved!
Leftovers for dinner tonight, but I definitely improved on the garlic bread! I threw it under the broiler for a minute and look what happened!
Now THAT looks like garlic bread! It was awesome!
I also took the opportunity of leftovers to try my rigatoni experiment. Instead of making fauxghetti from my zucchini, I peeled them, cut the into sections, and hollowed them out! Served them with the leftover Italian sausage, take a look (through the steam):
They actually look more like calamari, huh? Anyway, my verdict? It was a nice change of pace, but it was a lot of tedious work, and considering they don't really taste like pasta, I'm gonna stick with the fauxghetti, because A) it's easy to make with the spirooli, and B) the twirl really makes ALL the difference when you're trying to trick yourself into thinking you're eating pasta. But hey, it never hurts to try, right?!
Merry Christmas to all, and to all, Ugga-Bugga!
Now THAT looks like garlic bread! It was awesome!
I also took the opportunity of leftovers to try my rigatoni experiment. Instead of making fauxghetti from my zucchini, I peeled them, cut the into sections, and hollowed them out! Served them with the leftover Italian sausage, take a look (through the steam):
They actually look more like calamari, huh? Anyway, my verdict? It was a nice change of pace, but it was a lot of tedious work, and considering they don't really taste like pasta, I'm gonna stick with the fauxghetti, because A) it's easy to make with the spirooli, and B) the twirl really makes ALL the difference when you're trying to trick yourself into thinking you're eating pasta. But hey, it never hurts to try, right?!
Merry Christmas to all, and to all, Ugga-Bugga!
Thursday, December 23, 2010
Dinner:
You didn't think I'd tell you I was having fauxghetti and Italian sausage and not show you any pictures, did you?! First, this is how I made it (click on this recipe for details). Brown sausage:
Then make sauce (you're not using salt, so put in LOTS of fresh herbs and spices):
Finish cooking the sausages in the sauce and then serve:
Don't forget the Caveman Garlic Bread!
All organic, and NO GRAINS! Pretty miraculous for an Italian dinner that includes pasta and bread, huh? Ugga-Buggan right it is!
Then make sauce (you're not using salt, so put in LOTS of fresh herbs and spices):
Finish cooking the sausages in the sauce and then serve:
Don't forget the Caveman Garlic Bread!
All organic, and NO GRAINS! Pretty miraculous for an Italian dinner that includes pasta and bread, huh? Ugga-Buggan right it is!
Caveman Garlic Bread!
This one's good! Remember that Paleo Parmesan I made the other day? You don't? Screw you then.
Okay, I'm in a good mood because I'm paleo and eating garlic bread, so I'll tell you. I found a paleo friendly mock parmesan cheese recipe. Here you go:
1 cup Brazil Nuts
2 Cloves Garlic
Pretty simple. Doesn't taste quite like cheese, but still, for paleo, pretty decent substitute. But as I keep eating it, the smell reminded me more and more of garlic bread. Well, my regular bread recipe is made from nut flour anyway, like almonds or walnuts, so it wouldn't be a stretch to make my bread out of the brazil nut flour! One little tweak though from my regular bread recipe to make it as close to garlic bread as I can get it. Okay, in a bowl mix all these organic ingredients:
1 cup of brazil nut flour
1/4 cup of arrowroot
3 tablespoons of olive oil
3 eggs
Pour into a baking pan, and spread to even out. Don't worry if it's too thin, mine is usually only less than 1/2 of an inch thick, but feel free to experiment with thicker bread. Put it into a preheated oven of 350F for 5-10 minutes. While it's cooking, mix up:
2 cloves of garlic
A bunch of chopped parsley
A little more added olive oil
After 10 minutes in the oven (you want it firmer than the liquid mess you put in, but still kind of wet looking) remove bread and pour garlic mixture on top, gently spread out evenly, and continue baking for another 20 minutes until done. Then gaze upon garlicky goodness!
Came out great! I'm gonna serve it on the side of some fauxghetti and Italian Sausage I made today. I think brazil nut flour is my new GO-TO nut flour for bread! Leaves a little powdery residue like pizza crust, wonderful when you're trying to trick yourself into eating bread. I might even try making cheese-less pizza with it soon! Plus, brazil nuts have so many healthy benefits, including high amounts of selenium, which reduces the risk of colon, lung, skin, and prostate cancer (hear that guys!). I don't take any vitamins anymore since going paleo, instead, I prefer getting my vitamins and minerals from the all natural food I eat, rather than from a factory manufactured chemically solidified pill. So it's important to find different foods that give you different health benefits. Brazil nuts are something I never would have even tried, let alone cooked with, if I never went paleo, so don't be afraid to try new things. Become informed. See what vitamins you currently take, do a little googling to see what foods are high in those vitamins, and eat your way to health and vitality! Ugga-Bugga!
P.S.- If you plan on making a sandwich with the garlic bread, I recommend putting the garlic mixture right into the bread batter (skip the added olive oil) and baking the whole thing together (discovered in my experimenting stage). Sort of how my friend A. from Constructivedeconstruction might recreate traditional garlic bread (only she'd probably make it into the shape of a lego set first). This way, it's not as oily to handle when eating. Look:
I plan on making a favorite with it from my youth one day: Roast Pork on Garlic Bread with Duck Sauce! This is a sandwich I have never seen outside of a NY diner menu, and it was on EVERY diner menu when I was a kid. Such an odd combo of flavors, but it all works. Gonna wait until my plum sauce is back in season, and then watch out!
Saturday, December 18, 2010
Paleo Parmesan Almonds!
New delicious snack, and a great technique to jazz up ordinary food and keep it interesting:
Frying pan
Olive Oil
Raw Almonds
Fresh Oregano
Fresh Thyme
Black Pepper
Paleo Parmesan "Cheese" (you don't need a link for the recipe, I just posted it this morning, you lazy bastards!)
All ingredients, all organic, all the time (except the frying pan).
Heat up the oil, add almonds and herbs (doesn't have to be oregano, thyme, etc, any combo will do). When the raw almonds get toasty, and the fresh herbs start to crackle with crispness, transfer to a bowl. Sprinkle with Paleo Parmesan, and serve!
Funny, with paleo eating, you rarely overeat. I wanted to snack on a handful of almonds, but wanted to jazz them up from their boring self. So I threw a handful into the skillet, and it looked empty, so I threw in another handful. It was delicious, but after only about a half a handful, I was full, and stopped eating. I used to have "eyes bigger than my stomach," and even though I'd be full sometimes, I'd still eat everything on my plate (like my grandma drilled into me oh so many years ago). I've never been so in tune with my body since starting the caveman diet, and leftover snacks just means I don't have to cook one tomorrow, I can just reach for them, like a "normal" person would a bag of chips. It's a win-win situation!
Frying pan
Olive Oil
Raw Almonds
Fresh Oregano
Fresh Thyme
Black Pepper
Paleo Parmesan "Cheese" (you don't need a link for the recipe, I just posted it this morning, you lazy bastards!)
All ingredients, all organic, all the time (except the frying pan).
Heat up the oil, add almonds and herbs (doesn't have to be oregano, thyme, etc, any combo will do). When the raw almonds get toasty, and the fresh herbs start to crackle with crispness, transfer to a bowl. Sprinkle with Paleo Parmesan, and serve!
Funny, with paleo eating, you rarely overeat. I wanted to snack on a handful of almonds, but wanted to jazz them up from their boring self. So I threw a handful into the skillet, and it looked empty, so I threw in another handful. It was delicious, but after only about a half a handful, I was full, and stopped eating. I used to have "eyes bigger than my stomach," and even though I'd be full sometimes, I'd still eat everything on my plate (like my grandma drilled into me oh so many years ago). I've never been so in tune with my body since starting the caveman diet, and leftover snacks just means I don't have to cook one tomorrow, I can just reach for them, like a "normal" person would a bag of chips. It's a win-win situation!
Paleo Lasagna: Cooking Caveman Style!
Many of you in the fitblr community have been trying this Paleo Lasagna recipe that's being traded back and forth. I got mine from Billdoeslife, but I'm pretty sure it's the same one everyone has by now. Everyone raves about how delicious it is, but I have to be honest, it may taste good, but it wasn't looking too appetizing to me. First of all, I never saw anyone cutting their zucchini the long way, like a lasagna noodle. They were cutting them into little circles. Doesn't change the taste obviously, but if I'm gonna eat lasagna, I want LASAGNA! So I decided to make my own version and see if I can improve on it some.
The best lasagna I ever tasted, Nona (Grandma) Elvira's Lasagna from the LA restaurant Angelini Osteria, had a meat mixture of ground beef, veal, and chicken livers ("Chicken livers, dude, please, you're not at Katz's Deli anymore, I thought you loved Italian food!"). Relax, chicken livers is very Italian, the grandmother who created that lasagna dish was from Northern Italy. Besides, I'm never against trying something new whether I fail or not. Plus, I've been saving chicken livers in the freezer, leftover from all those Friday night roast chickens I've made this past year, and they have to get used eventually. Anyway, I took a combination of things I loved from Nona Elvira's recipe, and parts from the Paleo Lasagna recipe. My meat mixture was beef, pork, and chicken livers.
Let's talk about the pork for a moment. The Paleo Lasagna recipe calls for "Italian Sausage." Well, I know I'm more hard core than a lot of you tumblr cavemen when it comes to salt, and if an organic sausage exists on the market without added salt, then I haven't found it yet. So I make my own (click for recipe). In this case, most of the ingredients I make my sausage with was already in the sauce, so I just added fennel seeds to the whole mixture (or "ragu"), along with the other herbs, spices, and goodies (all ingredients, all organic, all the time):
1/2 pound Grass Fed Beef
1/2 pound Organic Ground Pork
1/2 pound Organic Chicken Livers
Fennel Seed (I don't measure the rest of the crap, I just go by feel)
Fresh Basil
Fresh Oregano
Garlic
Onion
Mushrooms
Celery
Crushed Red Pepper Flakes
Black Pepper
Like the Paleo recipe, I sauteed the veggies first, then browned the meat with it together. I added a can of that tomato paste, and a jar of those strained tomatoes I've told you about before (see: Ten Condiments). Ragu, done.
I took some zucchini and, using a mandolin slicer, I cut them the long way. I also sliced some eggplant (I bought extra, so I can try Susie's pizza recipe!), and made the bottom layer with that to give it some bulk, and added flavor! Layer of eggplant, layer of ragu, layer of zucchini, layer of ragu, topped with a layer of whatever zucchini and eggplant I had left. Then a thin, light spread of ragu for color.
But still, I'm not happy. Lasagna is not lasagna without cheese! Well, then, I'm f@#$%*! But I used my best kitchen tool (the Internet) and found a paleo mock parmesan cheese recipe! I don't know if this will work, but it's worth a shot! All it's made from is:
1 cup Brazil Nuts
2 Cloves Garlic
Throw it into the food processor until it's fluffy like parmesan cheese, and that's it! Hmm, looks good. Let's taste. Tastes good! Not like cheese, but the texture is right, and the raw garlic chopped so finely gives it a great flavor! Okay, I just tried toasting some, and it tastes too much like nuts now, so let's go with raw!
Well, the lasagna is done, and I've sprinkled the Paleo Parmesan on it. Take a look (sorry, I already cut into it before taking a photo):
Here, you can really see the layers with this cross section:
Not bad. Still... I love mozzarella. F@#$%* again! Okay, let's try one last thing. I saw Tinaeatsdonuts eating some leftover Paleo Lasagna the other day with an egg on top! Okay, it wasn't the best looking thing in the world, but like Anthony Bourdain says, "I'm a total egg slut." Or maybe he said "egg whore." Either way, put an egg on almost anything and I'll like it. So Tina inspired me to try to use a sunny side egg, with the yolk broken at the end, as an alternative to mozzarella. I mean, it's rich, creamy, firm, and white, so let's give it a shot. Plus, I was encouraged that Susie's pizza came out well, also using egg as a cheese substitute. I cooked an egg, threw it on a slice, added some more Paleo Parmesan, and this is how it looked:
Not bad. Kind of, sort of, maybe with squinting, looks like traditional lasagna. Or maybe it looks just as crappy as everyone else's and I'm in major denial. Whatever, let's taste it already! By now, I'm starved, so I'll have one slice with the egg, and one without as a taste test:
Tastes.... good. Great? Eh. In retrospect, I would have either grilled the eggplant first to bring out the flavor more, or skipped it altogether and just went with zucchini. But the chicken liver is a nice subtle difference, it blends in nicely with the rest of the meat. But if I didn't have chicken liver in the house, I probably wouldn't have added it, and probably won't again in the future, especially if I'm looking for a more traditional flavor. The egg? I tasted a slice both with and without the egg, and although the egg adds texture, the taste takes away from the lasagna flavor a little too much for my taste.
But the Paleo Parmesan is a keeper! Truthfully, the lasagna is very flavorful, but without the heavy cheese presence normally associated with lasagna, and with the work involved in both cooking AND cleaning up afterwards, I think I'd rather just have the meat sauce with my fauxghetti, with the Paleo Parmesan sprinkled on top.
That's just one caveman's opinion. But hey, I gave it a try, and I think I at least improved on the looks of the dish. That's one small step for caveman, one giant Ugga-Bugga for caveman kind.
The best lasagna I ever tasted, Nona (Grandma) Elvira's Lasagna from the LA restaurant Angelini Osteria, had a meat mixture of ground beef, veal, and chicken livers ("Chicken livers, dude, please, you're not at Katz's Deli anymore, I thought you loved Italian food!"). Relax, chicken livers is very Italian, the grandmother who created that lasagna dish was from Northern Italy. Besides, I'm never against trying something new whether I fail or not. Plus, I've been saving chicken livers in the freezer, leftover from all those Friday night roast chickens I've made this past year, and they have to get used eventually. Anyway, I took a combination of things I loved from Nona Elvira's recipe, and parts from the Paleo Lasagna recipe. My meat mixture was beef, pork, and chicken livers.
Let's talk about the pork for a moment. The Paleo Lasagna recipe calls for "Italian Sausage." Well, I know I'm more hard core than a lot of you tumblr cavemen when it comes to salt, and if an organic sausage exists on the market without added salt, then I haven't found it yet. So I make my own (click for recipe). In this case, most of the ingredients I make my sausage with was already in the sauce, so I just added fennel seeds to the whole mixture (or "ragu"), along with the other herbs, spices, and goodies (all ingredients, all organic, all the time):
1/2 pound Grass Fed Beef
1/2 pound Organic Ground Pork
1/2 pound Organic Chicken Livers
Fennel Seed (I don't measure the rest of the crap, I just go by feel)
Fresh Basil
Fresh Oregano
Garlic
Onion
Mushrooms
Celery
Crushed Red Pepper Flakes
Black Pepper
Like the Paleo recipe, I sauteed the veggies first, then browned the meat with it together. I added a can of that tomato paste, and a jar of those strained tomatoes I've told you about before (see: Ten Condiments). Ragu, done.
I took some zucchini and, using a mandolin slicer, I cut them the long way. I also sliced some eggplant (I bought extra, so I can try Susie's pizza recipe!), and made the bottom layer with that to give it some bulk, and added flavor! Layer of eggplant, layer of ragu, layer of zucchini, layer of ragu, topped with a layer of whatever zucchini and eggplant I had left. Then a thin, light spread of ragu for color.
But still, I'm not happy. Lasagna is not lasagna without cheese! Well, then, I'm f@#$%*! But I used my best kitchen tool (the Internet) and found a paleo mock parmesan cheese recipe! I don't know if this will work, but it's worth a shot! All it's made from is:
1 cup Brazil Nuts
2 Cloves Garlic
Throw it into the food processor until it's fluffy like parmesan cheese, and that's it! Hmm, looks good. Let's taste. Tastes good! Not like cheese, but the texture is right, and the raw garlic chopped so finely gives it a great flavor! Okay, I just tried toasting some, and it tastes too much like nuts now, so let's go with raw!
Well, the lasagna is done, and I've sprinkled the Paleo Parmesan on it. Take a look (sorry, I already cut into it before taking a photo):
Here, you can really see the layers with this cross section:
Not bad. Still... I love mozzarella. F@#$%* again! Okay, let's try one last thing. I saw Tinaeatsdonuts eating some leftover Paleo Lasagna the other day with an egg on top! Okay, it wasn't the best looking thing in the world, but like Anthony Bourdain says, "I'm a total egg slut." Or maybe he said "egg whore." Either way, put an egg on almost anything and I'll like it. So Tina inspired me to try to use a sunny side egg, with the yolk broken at the end, as an alternative to mozzarella. I mean, it's rich, creamy, firm, and white, so let's give it a shot. Plus, I was encouraged that Susie's pizza came out well, also using egg as a cheese substitute. I cooked an egg, threw it on a slice, added some more Paleo Parmesan, and this is how it looked:
Not bad. Kind of, sort of, maybe with squinting, looks like traditional lasagna. Or maybe it looks just as crappy as everyone else's and I'm in major denial. Whatever, let's taste it already! By now, I'm starved, so I'll have one slice with the egg, and one without as a taste test:
Tastes.... good. Great? Eh. In retrospect, I would have either grilled the eggplant first to bring out the flavor more, or skipped it altogether and just went with zucchini. But the chicken liver is a nice subtle difference, it blends in nicely with the rest of the meat. But if I didn't have chicken liver in the house, I probably wouldn't have added it, and probably won't again in the future, especially if I'm looking for a more traditional flavor. The egg? I tasted a slice both with and without the egg, and although the egg adds texture, the taste takes away from the lasagna flavor a little too much for my taste.
But the Paleo Parmesan is a keeper! Truthfully, the lasagna is very flavorful, but without the heavy cheese presence normally associated with lasagna, and with the work involved in both cooking AND cleaning up afterwards, I think I'd rather just have the meat sauce with my fauxghetti, with the Paleo Parmesan sprinkled on top.
That's just one caveman's opinion. But hey, I gave it a try, and I think I at least improved on the looks of the dish. That's one small step for caveman, one giant Ugga-Bugga for caveman kind.
Friday, December 17, 2010
Breakfast: Eggs 2 Ways
When you can't decide between two different ways to cook something, I say, whenever possible, cook it BOTH ways.
In accordance with my recent theory that any spice that goes well with chicken will go well with eggs, I experimented a little with breakfast. Never had dill will eggs before, but I have now! With some fresh thyme, black pepper, and jalapeno (all ingredients, all organic, all the time). Take a look:
Also, in honor of my new friend Susie from Italy, some Eggs Italiano! This one was actually a test for something I'm making later (I'm such a cave tease), but it came out delicious. Just simple, black pepper, dry oregano, garlic powder, and crushed red pepper. Lookie:
Good stuff. See you all around dinner time with, hopefully, a fantastic twist on a recently very popular dish!
In accordance with my recent theory that any spice that goes well with chicken will go well with eggs, I experimented a little with breakfast. Never had dill will eggs before, but I have now! With some fresh thyme, black pepper, and jalapeno (all ingredients, all organic, all the time). Take a look:
Also, in honor of my new friend Susie from Italy, some Eggs Italiano! This one was actually a test for something I'm making later (I'm such a cave tease), but it came out delicious. Just simple, black pepper, dry oregano, garlic powder, and crushed red pepper. Lookie:
Good stuff. See you all around dinner time with, hopefully, a fantastic twist on a recently very popular dish!
Wednesday, December 15, 2010
Orange Ginger Shrimp!
Ingredients:
One bag of Trader Joe's WILD CAUGHT blue shrimp
Ginger (freshly grated)
Garlic (chopped)
Onions (chopped)
Olive oil
Greens (cut into chunks, any kind will do, Chard, Collard, Mustard, Spinach, Kale, etc)
Half an orange.
Zucchini (spirooli'd into noodles)
Stir fry the ginger, garlic, onions, and greens in the olive oil. When veggies start to soften, yet remain firm (like my heart), add shrimp. Once shrimp are brightly colored (2-6 minutes), squeeze ALL the juice from the orange into the mixture. Get it all, including what bits of pulp spill in too. Add the zucchini noodles, and toss everything together. If you need more sauce, add some or all the juice from the other orange (add more oil too to keep the balance). Take a look:
And it tasted AMAZING!!! From what I heard anyway. BECAUSE I DIDN'T MAKE IT!!!! My cavewoman sister Sherilyn did! All on her own! On the other side of the continent! I'm so proud of her!
You can use a million varieties of Sherilyn's recipe, much like you can with any Paleo Surprise meal! She was craving oranges, and look what she came up with! As good as anything you can get in a Chinese restaurant, plus, it's all organic, no salt, gluten free, hell, it's all grains-free, it's pure paleo!
I'm telling you, I'm gonna start charging money to teach people how to be their own caveperson! Now go, my many minions of cavepeople, go, and create more culinary masterpieces! Our numbers will build, and we'll slowly take over the world, one meal at a time! And then one day, from every kitchen, and every dining room, and every restaurant around the world, the cry of "Ugga-Bugga" will be heard!
One bag of Trader Joe's WILD CAUGHT blue shrimp
Ginger (freshly grated)
Garlic (chopped)
Onions (chopped)
Olive oil
Greens (cut into chunks, any kind will do, Chard, Collard, Mustard, Spinach, Kale, etc)
Half an orange.
Zucchini (spirooli'd into noodles)
Stir fry the ginger, garlic, onions, and greens in the olive oil. When veggies start to soften, yet remain firm (like my heart), add shrimp. Once shrimp are brightly colored (2-6 minutes), squeeze ALL the juice from the orange into the mixture. Get it all, including what bits of pulp spill in too. Add the zucchini noodles, and toss everything together. If you need more sauce, add some or all the juice from the other orange (add more oil too to keep the balance). Take a look:
You can use a million varieties of Sherilyn's recipe, much like you can with any Paleo Surprise meal! She was craving oranges, and look what she came up with! As good as anything you can get in a Chinese restaurant, plus, it's all organic, no salt, gluten free, hell, it's all grains-free, it's pure paleo!
I'm telling you, I'm gonna start charging money to teach people how to be their own caveperson! Now go, my many minions of cavepeople, go, and create more culinary masterpieces! Our numbers will build, and we'll slowly take over the world, one meal at a time! And then one day, from every kitchen, and every dining room, and every restaurant around the world, the cry of "Ugga-Bugga" will be heard!
Tuesday, December 14, 2010
Burger and Delicata Fries!
You've seen it all before, so look up the recipes if you like. All ingredients, all organic, all the time.
Grass Fed Ground Beef
Rosemary Almond Bread
Cucumbers + Fresh Dill = Fake Pickles
Red Onion
Hot Sauce (leftover from my wings the other night. Like ketchup with a kick!)
And a side of those delectable Delicata French Fries!
Apple Walnut Caveman Crunch Cereal!
Another simple tasty snack that feels like a meal, an organic apple cut up with organic walnut pieces sprinkled over them. I'm eating it out of a bowl with a spoon, and it almost feels like a pretty damn tasty paleo breakfast cereal. Apple Walnut Caveman Crunch! I can see it rotting on the supermarket shelves now! But it does look good, no? So simple and so yummy. Enjoy!
Sunday, December 12, 2010
Paleo Surprise!
I'm calling this dish Paleo Surprise (choose from Chicken, Beef, Pork, or Shrimp*)
*$2 extra.
Sorry, my long history of reading Chinese Food Take-Out menus makes me automatically write that next to the word "shrimp."
It's a simple dish really, anyone can make it, and chances are you already have the ingredients in your kitchen to make it right now. All I did was take a page from my girl Christinadoeslife, who took her page from Robb Wolff, a guy who knows a lot more about the paleo lifestyle than even yours truly, the Prince of Paleo, the Captain of Cavemen, the Ugga of Bugga. Here's what the lovely Christina shared with her readers:
christinadoeslife:
Pretty much it's a guide that Robb Wolf put together to show you that your variety of meal choices are endless. Take one or more proteins, one or more veggies, one or more fat (fat, as in cooking oil), and one or more herbs & spices. Combine in a frying pan, and you will almost never screw it up, and it'll also almost always be delicious.
I just decided to see what I had in the fridge tonight, and took out everything that HAD to be used up (even with the green bags, most organic food still spoils in a week or so). I took out some broccoli, some mushrooms, some celery, a shallot (my first shallot!), and some dino kale (aka, black kale, more like a spinach than the curly variety of kale I normally make the kale chips out of). Okay, those are all going to be my veggies for tonight's dinner.
I was in the mood for a taste of the Mediterranean (maybe it's because I've been reading so much of my new Italian friend Susie's blog lately, check her out: http://allmyhorizons.tumblr.com/), so I chose olive oil for my fat. Perhaps I would have chosen coconut oil had the cilantro I took out not already spoiled, and moved the whole feel of the dish over to Southeast Asia, but it was not to be. The cilantro gave it's life for my "No-Peanut Noodles" and trust me, it did not die in vain. 'Cause that sucker was goooood! Go, look, I'll wait: http://cookingcaveman.tumblr.com/post/2126474702/panning-for-gold-and-striking-oil and then: http://cookingcaveman.tumblr.com/post/2128615995/new-improved-thai-no-peanut-noodles
Once I decided I would be making broccoli, mushrooms, celery, shallots, and kale, I started to shape the dish in my mind. I figured shrimp would go best with these ingredients, so I defrosted one of the bags of Wild Caught Shrimp from Trader Joe's I keep in my freezer for just this occasion! I try to have two or three bags in the freezer at all times, they're quick to defrost, and already cleaned, so any meal can be made quickly! Okay, we have our protein now, the shrimp, we have our veggies, we have our olive oil as a fat, and now we just need to spice it up! We know it's going to be Mediterranean, so I took out some lemon juice, garlic, some oregano, and some black pepper. Bell peppers might go nicely with this too, but I don't have any, but I do have some jalapeno, so let's throw some southwest into the dish, just to mix things up a little. Besides, I'm going to want it to be hot anyway (because that's what I do), so this will also replace the crushed red pepper flakes I would have inevitably reached for.
Okay, I'm ready to cook. First step, let's take the kale, and throw it all into the food processor, stems and all, and make a variation of my healthy rice (see in archives: Replacing Rice). Into a pan with olive oil it goes, and let it cook on low, give it a toss now and then, while making the rest of the dish. I know the first time I made this rice, I added garlic and black pepper to it, but I'm thinking it's better to keep this base of the dish plain, and let all the other flavors, including the sauce, enhance and add to it's flavor. I also only used the stems last time, but dino kale is less leafy, so keep the leaves for a nice mix of textures.
In a separate pan, heat some more olive oil (be generous, you stingy bastard), and throw in some finely chopped (use the food processor again, that's what it's there for, lazy bastards unite!) shallots, celery, and garlic. Quarter your mushrooms, and break your broccoli into bite sized pieces and throw those little bastards in there too! Toss in the jalapeno while you're at it, plus the spices, this dish is fool proof! Keep stirring, and don't forget your healthy rice either, you don't want the kale to burn. Once the veggies start to soften (you don't want it too soft, it'll be mushy, and all the nutrients will be cooked out), either transfer the food to a plate, or just do what I do, move it all around to the edges of the pan, clearing room for your shrimp that will go in the middle. Add some more olive oil if needed, and add your shrimp. Once they turn to a bright color, flip, just a couple of minutes on each side. Once done, add your lemon juice to add flavor and deglaze the pan. Mix it all up with a wooden spoon (get all those yummy bits off the bottom).
Now serve, like you would any dish you serve over rice. First a layer of healthy rice, then a helping of Paleo Surprise (with Shrimp*), be liberal with the sauce (add more olive oil and lemon juice if needed, you don't want it dry). Take a look:
Yummy! This meal can be made any time you're stumped for what to make for dinner. Almost any combo of ingredients in your fridge can be a tasty, satisfying, hot meal. Thank you Robb Wolf, Christina, Susie, the producers, the Academy, the Hollywood Foreign Press, and all you people up in the balcony, this one's for you! Ugga-Bugga.
*$2 extra.
Sorry, my long history of reading Chinese Food Take-Out menus makes me automatically write that next to the word "shrimp."
It's a simple dish really, anyone can make it, and chances are you already have the ingredients in your kitchen to make it right now. All I did was take a page from my girl Christinadoeslife, who took her page from Robb Wolff, a guy who knows a lot more about the paleo lifestyle than even yours truly, the Prince of Paleo, the Captain of Cavemen, the Ugga of Bugga. Here's what the lovely Christina shared with her readers:
christinadoeslife:
Here’s a link to Robb Wolf’s paleo food matrix in PDF form.
Pretty much it's a guide that Robb Wolf put together to show you that your variety of meal choices are endless. Take one or more proteins, one or more veggies, one or more fat (fat, as in cooking oil), and one or more herbs & spices. Combine in a frying pan, and you will almost never screw it up, and it'll also almost always be delicious.
I just decided to see what I had in the fridge tonight, and took out everything that HAD to be used up (even with the green bags, most organic food still spoils in a week or so). I took out some broccoli, some mushrooms, some celery, a shallot (my first shallot!), and some dino kale (aka, black kale, more like a spinach than the curly variety of kale I normally make the kale chips out of). Okay, those are all going to be my veggies for tonight's dinner.
I was in the mood for a taste of the Mediterranean (maybe it's because I've been reading so much of my new Italian friend Susie's blog lately, check her out: http://allmyhorizons.tumblr.com/), so I chose olive oil for my fat. Perhaps I would have chosen coconut oil had the cilantro I took out not already spoiled, and moved the whole feel of the dish over to Southeast Asia, but it was not to be. The cilantro gave it's life for my "No-Peanut Noodles" and trust me, it did not die in vain. 'Cause that sucker was goooood! Go, look, I'll wait: http://cookingcaveman.tumblr.com/post/2126474702/panning-for-gold-and-striking-oil and then: http://cookingcaveman.tumblr.com/post/2128615995/new-improved-thai-no-peanut-noodles
Once I decided I would be making broccoli, mushrooms, celery, shallots, and kale, I started to shape the dish in my mind. I figured shrimp would go best with these ingredients, so I defrosted one of the bags of Wild Caught Shrimp from Trader Joe's I keep in my freezer for just this occasion! I try to have two or three bags in the freezer at all times, they're quick to defrost, and already cleaned, so any meal can be made quickly! Okay, we have our protein now, the shrimp, we have our veggies, we have our olive oil as a fat, and now we just need to spice it up! We know it's going to be Mediterranean, so I took out some lemon juice, garlic, some oregano, and some black pepper. Bell peppers might go nicely with this too, but I don't have any, but I do have some jalapeno, so let's throw some southwest into the dish, just to mix things up a little. Besides, I'm going to want it to be hot anyway (because that's what I do), so this will also replace the crushed red pepper flakes I would have inevitably reached for.
Okay, I'm ready to cook. First step, let's take the kale, and throw it all into the food processor, stems and all, and make a variation of my healthy rice (see in archives: Replacing Rice). Into a pan with olive oil it goes, and let it cook on low, give it a toss now and then, while making the rest of the dish. I know the first time I made this rice, I added garlic and black pepper to it, but I'm thinking it's better to keep this base of the dish plain, and let all the other flavors, including the sauce, enhance and add to it's flavor. I also only used the stems last time, but dino kale is less leafy, so keep the leaves for a nice mix of textures.
In a separate pan, heat some more olive oil (be generous, you stingy bastard), and throw in some finely chopped (use the food processor again, that's what it's there for, lazy bastards unite!) shallots, celery, and garlic. Quarter your mushrooms, and break your broccoli into bite sized pieces and throw those little bastards in there too! Toss in the jalapeno while you're at it, plus the spices, this dish is fool proof! Keep stirring, and don't forget your healthy rice either, you don't want the kale to burn. Once the veggies start to soften (you don't want it too soft, it'll be mushy, and all the nutrients will be cooked out), either transfer the food to a plate, or just do what I do, move it all around to the edges of the pan, clearing room for your shrimp that will go in the middle. Add some more olive oil if needed, and add your shrimp. Once they turn to a bright color, flip, just a couple of minutes on each side. Once done, add your lemon juice to add flavor and deglaze the pan. Mix it all up with a wooden spoon (get all those yummy bits off the bottom).
Now serve, like you would any dish you serve over rice. First a layer of healthy rice, then a helping of Paleo Surprise (with Shrimp*), be liberal with the sauce (add more olive oil and lemon juice if needed, you don't want it dry). Take a look:
Yummy! This meal can be made any time you're stumped for what to make for dinner. Almost any combo of ingredients in your fridge can be a tasty, satisfying, hot meal. Thank you Robb Wolf, Christina, Susie, the producers, the Academy, the Hollywood Foreign Press, and all you people up in the balcony, this one's for you! Ugga-Bugga.
Friday, December 10, 2010
Wing Dings!
You all know how much I love hot wings (see: http://cookingcaveman.tumblr.com/post/1382487702/hot-wings-two-ways), but last time I made a classic buffalo wing, as well as wings with my now classic Plum Loco Sauce. This time I was in the mood for what I used to call as a kid, "Wing Dings," which are really only a fun way to say fried chicken wings. I don't know if any of you fat bastards out there have tried KFC's hot wings, but that's what I'm talking about, breaded wings, with a bite, that you eat with hot sauce.
This was a lot easier to make than I thought. Or maybe it's just that I've gotten to the point where these things are becoming easier. This January 1st will be one year for me on the caveman diet, so hopefully, some lessons are sinking in. First, I marinated the wings in herbs in spices all day. I used (say it with me: all ingredients, all organic, all the time) fresh rosemary and thyme, dry sage, mustard powder, black pepper, garlic powder, onion powder, paprika, and cayenne pepper. Cut to hours later, when I made the hot sauce (again, see: http://cookingcaveman.tumblr.com/post/1382487702/hot-wings-two-ways). It came out just as good as the first time or better! The only difference is I used green jalapeno instead of red, because that's what I had in the fridge. Take a look at it:
Beautiful red color! Tasted just like a Frank's Red Hot or a Cholula or a Tapatio type of sauce, only incredibly fresher and non-processed!
And finally I made the wings themselves. All I did was make the same batter I use for my almond bread (see: http://cookingcaveman.tumblr.com/post/1278380583/caveman-cannot-live-on-bread-alone), added a little more garlic powder, onion powder and paprika, dipped the wings in the batter, and then put them into the deep fryer (with sunflower oil because of it's high burning point). The only bad thing about this deep fryer is it's small, so I could only cook about 6 wings parts at a time, and I had 24 of them (12 whole wings, cut into wings and drumettes), so at 8 minutes a batch, it took a while. But they came out great, look:
Gorgeous, no? Gorgeous, YES! A little hot sauce on those bad boys and they went down REAL GOOD!
While I had the deep fryer going, I decided to make a delicata squash into mock sweet potato fries as a side dish. If you remember the first time I made them (see: http://cookingcaveman.tumblr.com/post/1647714032/pumpkin-pie-kale-salad-and-coconut-shrimp-redux) I baked them in the oven, with nothing but a little olive oil drizzled on them. I threw them in the deep fryer this time, and for some reason, hot oil started overflowing from the fryer all over my counter top and onto my kitchen floor. Ug. "Ug" is caveman for "oy." Once I got things back under control (and not looking forward to the clean up afterwards), I cooked them in small batches (literally three or four at a time), and that seemed to do it. But again, it took forever! Was it worth it? You tell me:
They were good, but truthfully, they were better from the oven because they were more crispy from the oven, and less oily! So, another experiment goes bad, oh well, you live, you learn, but either way, you eat. And usually you eat pretty well too if you're eating in my cave. Ugga-Bugga!
Thursday, December 9, 2010
Butternut Squash
Like most of my fries experiments, it never got crispy (didn't even brown), but in all honesty I didn't really try, I didn't have the energy to get out the deep fryer, so I used the oven (see: lazy bastard). But it had to be used up. Nonetheless, the butternut squash was delicious, with just some black pepper, garlic powder, and a HINT of fresh thyme (all ingredients, all organic, all the time). Soft, but yummy. Who need toxic sweet potatoes when healthy squash tastes just as great (or better):
Besides, if I really want fries, I have a few delicata squash for that (http://cookingcaveman.tumblr.com/post/1647714032/pumpkin-pie-kale-salad-and-coconut-shrimp-redux).
Besides, if I really want fries, I have a few delicata squash for that (http://cookingcaveman.tumblr.com/post/1647714032/pumpkin-pie-kale-salad-and-coconut-shrimp-redux).
Kale Chips & Eggs?!
Yes, you heard me right! I woke up this morning with a craving for Kale Chips (see recipe page for, well, the recipe, duh). But Kale Chips for breakfast?! Hey why not? In fact, since I think Kale Chips taste like potato chips, and potatoes and eggs go so well together (only not on the caveman diet), let's combine the two and see what happens. Come on, come with, don't be scared... I won't drop you, come.
My first thought was to make it in a scramble, but I also thought the crispiness of the kale chips would go great with a soft yolk from sunny side eggs, creating an incredible texture! I mean, I love the outer crispy part of hash browns, as the yolk runs onto the edge during a typical diner breakfast. So this seems like a natural. I can't decide, so let's make it BOTH ways!
Now, I've made kale and eggs before, in an omelet, but always sauteed kale, which tastes much more like spinach than potatoes, so by making the kale into chips first, would add a whole new dimension! First, the sunny side eggs. Take a look:
Pretty awesome. Yes, the textures were wonderful, and yes, I would eat this again. Seasoned with just the Holy Trinity of spices (look. it. up.), delicious. But the scramble was a superstar! I sauteed some leftover mushrooms that have to get used up (mushrooms and kale are perfect together), in some fresh thyme (all ingredients, all organic, all the time), and black pepper. Then poured in the scrambled eggs, and finally the crispy kale chips (already seasoned in Holy Trinity). Look:
Outrageous! The textures of the soft mushrooms, the crispy kale chips, the wet eggs (I don't like my eggs too well done, I like them a teensy bit wet) made for an amazing party in my mouth! And the thyme really brings it to life! Remember, without salt in your diet, don't be afraid to try new herbs and spices in your food, you'll be amazed at the variety one simple dish has when combined with different seasoning! This dish will be had again and again.
Plus, I have all these delicious kale chips left over! I guarantee they will not make it to lunch. Caveman like! Ugga-Bugga!
My first thought was to make it in a scramble, but I also thought the crispiness of the kale chips would go great with a soft yolk from sunny side eggs, creating an incredible texture! I mean, I love the outer crispy part of hash browns, as the yolk runs onto the edge during a typical diner breakfast. So this seems like a natural. I can't decide, so let's make it BOTH ways!
Now, I've made kale and eggs before, in an omelet, but always sauteed kale, which tastes much more like spinach than potatoes, so by making the kale into chips first, would add a whole new dimension! First, the sunny side eggs. Take a look:
Pretty awesome. Yes, the textures were wonderful, and yes, I would eat this again. Seasoned with just the Holy Trinity of spices (look. it. up.), delicious. But the scramble was a superstar! I sauteed some leftover mushrooms that have to get used up (mushrooms and kale are perfect together), in some fresh thyme (all ingredients, all organic, all the time), and black pepper. Then poured in the scrambled eggs, and finally the crispy kale chips (already seasoned in Holy Trinity). Look:
Outrageous! The textures of the soft mushrooms, the crispy kale chips, the wet eggs (I don't like my eggs too well done, I like them a teensy bit wet) made for an amazing party in my mouth! And the thyme really brings it to life! Remember, without salt in your diet, don't be afraid to try new herbs and spices in your food, you'll be amazed at the variety one simple dish has when combined with different seasoning! This dish will be had again and again.
Plus, I have all these delicious kale chips left over! I guarantee they will not make it to lunch. Caveman like! Ugga-Bugga!
Tuesday, December 7, 2010
2nd Breakfast!
All this talk about good fat has made me hungry again. I had breakfast, but 4 hours ago, and since it's still morning here in LA, I'm gonna have breakfast again! So there!
Organic Eggs, Sunny Side up, with organic Avocado, organic thyme, and organic black pepper (not shown). Check out how beautiful those organic yolks are! That's the color of pure Omega-3, baby! Tough to find that color with store bought factory farmed eggs.
If you've never had avocado and eggs together, try it. It's rich, and creamy, so filling and delicious! And healthy!!!! Remember, fat is our friend (the good fat anyway), not our enemy, and fat intake has nothing to do with weight loss! But it has everything to do with flavor! Enjoy. Ugga-Bugga!
Paleo Egg Drop Soup!
I have to finish the leftover ramen soup, so instead of freezing it, or making more zucchini noodles and having ramen for the fourth straight day, I'm mixing it up a little and I made some egg drop soup for breakfast. Just scramble some eggs in a bowl, bring the soup to a boil, and add the eggs in a long straight stream, creating ribbons of egg as it hits the bubbling broth! Take a 1/4 cup of arrowroot, and dissolve in some filtered water, then slowly add to the boiling soup, to thicken. I like to finish it by adding hot Chinese mustard, which is only dry mustard powder dissolved in a little water (all ingredients, all organic, all the time).
Zucchini Noodles Tip
Look how great the zucchini noodles twirl on your fork when you cook them down a bit!
Monday, December 6, 2010
New & Improved Thai "No-Peanut" Noodles!
Notice the darker color this time? I got it right! Plus I added some shredded carrot. My new favorite sauce! I also REALLY cooked the zucchini noodles this time. Let them simmer in a pot of chicken broth for 15 minutes, and then DRAIN WELL, otherwise the broth will make the sauce too soupy. As the noodles cool, put them in a strainer and let the liquid run off (remember, save the broth for the freezer). They came out long, and perfect, the closest to noodles so far. Caveman like Thai “No-Peanut” Noodles! Ugga-Bugga!
Sunday, December 5, 2010
Panning For Gold And Striking Oil!
Organic oil, that is...
One of my favorite all-time dishes is Cold Sesame Noodles. If you've never had these delectable Chinese rice noodles in a peanut butter based sauce, you're missing out. I've been making my own for almost 20 years from a recipe my sister found somewhere. At first I was making them at home using spaghetti, and it was delicious. Then, when I was a member in good standing with the low carb craze, I made them using carb free noodles made from konjac flour (don't ask, you think my paleo search for pasta was intense, you should have seen me looking for low carb pasta!). But once I went paleo, I kissed the recipe goodbye considering I couldn't have peanuts (not nuts, but actually legumes, and a no-no for cavemen) or noodles (usually made from grain, the good tasting ones anyway).
However, I've since discovered almond butter, which feels and tastes very much like peanut butter, only instead, it tastes like almonds (duh). Someone clued me into the Whole Foods brand, and the ingredients read: roasted organic almonds. Love those one ingredient labels!
And of course, if you're a regular reader, you know that I recently discovered zucchini (combined with my spirooli knock-off) as the perfect noodle replacement. If you're not a regular reader, we have a standing rule when you don't know what I'm talking about. Just search my blog, and LOOK IT UP YOURSELVES, YOU LAZY BASTARDS! Thank you. -Management
Okay, let's talk about the noodles first. The same spirooli cut zucchini I've used before, although the more I'm cooking with the zucchini, the more I realize it DOES need to be cooked more. The gentle steeping in whatever sauce I'm using just isn't cutting it anymore, the "noodles" are still TOO crunchy. I'll tell you, this zucchini is one tough monkey, it can really take a punchin' and keep on crunchin'! You can cook it a while and get it soft, and it'll STILL be al dente, with a definite CRUNCH. Plus, the more you cook it, the more it LOOKS like a noodle!
So this is what I did, and I actually recommend this for anytime you cook with zucchini noodles, otherwise known as fauxghetti (my friend Stacie's term), and recently dubbed, "Squashghetti" by my sister Sherilyn. I took some chicken broth (luckily I had some from the ramen soup I made yesterday), and just let the noodles cook in the broth, in a pot, for 10 minutes or so on low. Then I even left it in the broth as it cooled for a good 20 minutes or so after that (the heat was definitely still cooking those little noodle bastards), and when I tasted it, it was nice and loose, but still crunched when I bit into it. Next time I might test it by cooking the noodles even longer and try to get it softer still, we'll see, but for this experiment, I was happy with the final texture. Another reason I would simmer the zucchini in broth every time I use them is because zucchini doesn't have much flavor, so it absorbs the flavor of the broth, adding a new delicious wrinkle. I don't know if you've ever had pasta boiled in chicken broth, but it's delicious, and this follows the same principle. If you don't have broth, cook it down in whatever sauce you're using to add flavor!
I drained the noodles, saving the stock and putting it into the freezer for future use (see my blog on Hot Wings to see more about making stock from scratch). I put the soft (yet crunchy) noodles into the fridge to chill (after all this dish is called COLD Sesame Noodles), and tackled the sauce, using all paleo, organic ingredients.
Now, the original recipe called for garlic and ginger (both paleo-friendly, check), sesame oil (check), hot chili oil (I've got more heat than I know what to do with), 1/2 cup peanut butter (using almond butter instead, check), 3 tbs of sugar (honey is okay, check), 3 tbs of rice vinegar (using lime juice, check), top with julienned cucumbers and sliced scallions (check, and check). Oh, one more little ingredient I must have skipped over, 1/2 cup of soy sauce. Hmm, what's that? Soy sauce...?
Well, I'll be seeing you folks, this recipe just came to a screeching halt. Soy sauce is so non-paleo, it fails on multiple levels! First word, right there, soy, can't eat it. Soy is a bean, and so full of toxins, even "health food" restaurants and markets warn against eating too much of it. The soy lobby of America has convinced many people (like vegetarians), that soy (and other beans) is great for you, the best source of protein for those not eating meat! So the government subsidizes ton of soy farmers and the masses happily eat it in everything, along with some form of corn, another grain, and a caveman no-no (okay, enough ranting, go watch "Food, Inc" for yourselves).
The second reason you can't eat soy is it's fermented, which is non-paleo (although I'd love a drink right now). And thirdly, it is LOADED WITH SALT! Way too much salt for a family of five, let alone little old me. Nope, soy sauce is a near impossible re-creation for paleo cooking... UNTIL NOW!!!!
When I try to remember what soy sauce tastes like, I think it's got sort of a smokey flavor, and certainly salty. I was thinking what kind of paleo liquid might be smokey like soy sauce? Tea? Yeah, maybe, if it's strong enough. So I brewed two teabags of black organic tea in a cup of hot water (I used two to get it nice and strong), and also let a stalk of finely chopped celery steep in the tea (for the high natural salt content in celery) as it all cooled down to room temperature. Once cooled I tasted it to see what it needed. Hmm, good, not like soy sauce, but still, tasty, and it might work as a replacement, hidden in with other ingredients. It needs something else though, and unfortunately, I'm not a sophisticated enough cook to know what it is, so for now, it'll do. If you think of anything, let me know (must I do everything for you lazy bastards?).
I mixed all the ingredients together (even the scallions I was gonna put on top, but except for the noodles, and cucumber), and kept tasting to make sure it was right. Not bad, a little more vinegar, a smidgen of honey, a touch more almond butter, a drop more tea (you know that's how I roll, measuring cups are for the weak!). Okay, I'm liking this taste, this baby might just fly! Only one small adjustment, I'm gonna add one more finely chopped celery stalk for some more saltiness.
Once the zucchini noodles were cold, I took them out of the fridge and mixed them in the sauce, and tasted. A little bland, but damn, those soft noodles are still crunchy! It works in this dish though. In fact, the reason cucumber is added is to cool the spice down, and add some crunch, but it's crunchy enough between the zucchini and the celery, so I'm leaving the cucumber out for this trial run. Instead I'll throw some leftover red jalapeno on top, which is where I'll get my spice from too!
But it's still kind of, just okay. Bland, I guess, but it's something else. I think it's the lime juice we used to replace the vinegar. It's adding a tropical feel to the dish that isn't in the original Chinese recipe. But it is making it taste a little like Thai food. In fact, let me add some cilantro to it. Now I'll top it with the red jalapeno. Taste...
OMG, it's freakin' GREAT! No, it's not a cold sesame noodle replacement after all! It's actually a replacement for noodles in Thai Peanut Sauce! Like the Thai pasta I love at California Pizza Kitchen! Only I didn't use peanuts! It would be perfect for people with peanut allergies (which many have because peanuts are not supposed to be eaten by humans). AND, I used all organic ingredients, no toxins, chemicals, or pesticides, and NO SALT!!!! It's delicious! I just looked up a few Thai Peanut Sauce recipes on-line, and I pretty much nailed every one, except a lot called for coconut milk. I don't think it needs it, but maybe I'll try some next time. The cilantro makes all the difference, especially combined with the garlic and ginger, a perfect combo for Thai flavor. And the almond butter does not make you miss the peanut butter one bit! It's still nutty, rich and creamy! The tea adds some smokiness, but you can't really taste it, yet, maybe I do, because it's delicious, and I'm not missing the soy sauce at all! I think next time I'll either let the tea steep longer, or I'll add a third tea bag. Okay, that sounded dirty. Here, get your minds out of the gutter, you filthy bastards, and take a look at how it came out.
Could be a little darker in color and less soupy, so maybe next time add more almond butter and darken the tea, whatever gets the job done. The spirooli cuts the noodles really long too, so it's fun to eat as well as delicious! This sauce would go great on chicken too! Or in a salad dressing. I mean, it REALLY tastes like Thai Peanut Sauce! Maybe even crush some organic almonds and throw them on top for even more texture. Of course, the name "peanut sauce" doesn't really work, we need a new name. Thai Almond Butter Sauce? Thai "No-Peanut" Sauce? Needs work.
You see what happens when you experiment, you go looking for one thing, and you wind up finding something else wonderful (hence our title, Brainiacs)! In the meantime, this is just small breakthrough in the caveman re-creation of soy sauce. I'm going to experiment even more, and I'll start making more and more Asian dishes using that black gold (I know, my second Beverly Hillbillies reference, stop keeping track). Can Shrimp Lo Mein be far behind? Methinks not. I told you the spirooli changed everything! How many times would I have pasta (or noodles) during a week if it wasn't bad for me? Answer: practically every single friggin' day! I'm officially in my Pasta Period. Picasso had a Blue Period, where he worked very heavy in blue colors, and I'm going to work very heavy in pastas for while. Lasagna and rigatoni coming soon (rigatoni, are you mad?). But I've been craving fried chicken wings lately, so I might make those before the next pasta experiment. Plus, I always love a good burger, and I've also been craving egg salad. Hmm, all these choices on paleo. Who says dieting means deprivation? Whoops, sorry Christina (christinadoeslife.com), it's not a diet, it's a lifestyle! Ugga-Bugga!
One of my favorite all-time dishes is Cold Sesame Noodles. If you've never had these delectable Chinese rice noodles in a peanut butter based sauce, you're missing out. I've been making my own for almost 20 years from a recipe my sister found somewhere. At first I was making them at home using spaghetti, and it was delicious. Then, when I was a member in good standing with the low carb craze, I made them using carb free noodles made from konjac flour (don't ask, you think my paleo search for pasta was intense, you should have seen me looking for low carb pasta!). But once I went paleo, I kissed the recipe goodbye considering I couldn't have peanuts (not nuts, but actually legumes, and a no-no for cavemen) or noodles (usually made from grain, the good tasting ones anyway).
However, I've since discovered almond butter, which feels and tastes very much like peanut butter, only instead, it tastes like almonds (duh). Someone clued me into the Whole Foods brand, and the ingredients read: roasted organic almonds. Love those one ingredient labels!
And of course, if you're a regular reader, you know that I recently discovered zucchini (combined with my spirooli knock-off) as the perfect noodle replacement. If you're not a regular reader, we have a standing rule when you don't know what I'm talking about. Just search my blog, and LOOK IT UP YOURSELVES, YOU LAZY BASTARDS! Thank you. -Management
Okay, let's talk about the noodles first. The same spirooli cut zucchini I've used before, although the more I'm cooking with the zucchini, the more I realize it DOES need to be cooked more. The gentle steeping in whatever sauce I'm using just isn't cutting it anymore, the "noodles" are still TOO crunchy. I'll tell you, this zucchini is one tough monkey, it can really take a punchin' and keep on crunchin'! You can cook it a while and get it soft, and it'll STILL be al dente, with a definite CRUNCH. Plus, the more you cook it, the more it LOOKS like a noodle!
So this is what I did, and I actually recommend this for anytime you cook with zucchini noodles, otherwise known as fauxghetti (my friend Stacie's term), and recently dubbed, "Squashghetti" by my sister Sherilyn. I took some chicken broth (luckily I had some from the ramen soup I made yesterday), and just let the noodles cook in the broth, in a pot, for 10 minutes or so on low. Then I even left it in the broth as it cooled for a good 20 minutes or so after that (the heat was definitely still cooking those little noodle bastards), and when I tasted it, it was nice and loose, but still crunched when I bit into it. Next time I might test it by cooking the noodles even longer and try to get it softer still, we'll see, but for this experiment, I was happy with the final texture. Another reason I would simmer the zucchini in broth every time I use them is because zucchini doesn't have much flavor, so it absorbs the flavor of the broth, adding a new delicious wrinkle. I don't know if you've ever had pasta boiled in chicken broth, but it's delicious, and this follows the same principle. If you don't have broth, cook it down in whatever sauce you're using to add flavor!
I drained the noodles, saving the stock and putting it into the freezer for future use (see my blog on Hot Wings to see more about making stock from scratch). I put the soft (yet crunchy) noodles into the fridge to chill (after all this dish is called COLD Sesame Noodles), and tackled the sauce, using all paleo, organic ingredients.
Now, the original recipe called for garlic and ginger (both paleo-friendly, check), sesame oil (check), hot chili oil (I've got more heat than I know what to do with), 1/2 cup peanut butter (using almond butter instead, check), 3 tbs of sugar (honey is okay, check), 3 tbs of rice vinegar (using lime juice, check), top with julienned cucumbers and sliced scallions (check, and check). Oh, one more little ingredient I must have skipped over, 1/2 cup of soy sauce. Hmm, what's that? Soy sauce...?
Well, I'll be seeing you folks, this recipe just came to a screeching halt. Soy sauce is so non-paleo, it fails on multiple levels! First word, right there, soy, can't eat it. Soy is a bean, and so full of toxins, even "health food" restaurants and markets warn against eating too much of it. The soy lobby of America has convinced many people (like vegetarians), that soy (and other beans) is great for you, the best source of protein for those not eating meat! So the government subsidizes ton of soy farmers and the masses happily eat it in everything, along with some form of corn, another grain, and a caveman no-no (okay, enough ranting, go watch "Food, Inc" for yourselves).
The second reason you can't eat soy is it's fermented, which is non-paleo (although I'd love a drink right now). And thirdly, it is LOADED WITH SALT! Way too much salt for a family of five, let alone little old me. Nope, soy sauce is a near impossible re-creation for paleo cooking... UNTIL NOW!!!!
When I try to remember what soy sauce tastes like, I think it's got sort of a smokey flavor, and certainly salty. I was thinking what kind of paleo liquid might be smokey like soy sauce? Tea? Yeah, maybe, if it's strong enough. So I brewed two teabags of black organic tea in a cup of hot water (I used two to get it nice and strong), and also let a stalk of finely chopped celery steep in the tea (for the high natural salt content in celery) as it all cooled down to room temperature. Once cooled I tasted it to see what it needed. Hmm, good, not like soy sauce, but still, tasty, and it might work as a replacement, hidden in with other ingredients. It needs something else though, and unfortunately, I'm not a sophisticated enough cook to know what it is, so for now, it'll do. If you think of anything, let me know (must I do everything for you lazy bastards?).
I mixed all the ingredients together (even the scallions I was gonna put on top, but except for the noodles, and cucumber), and kept tasting to make sure it was right. Not bad, a little more vinegar, a smidgen of honey, a touch more almond butter, a drop more tea (you know that's how I roll, measuring cups are for the weak!). Okay, I'm liking this taste, this baby might just fly! Only one small adjustment, I'm gonna add one more finely chopped celery stalk for some more saltiness.
Once the zucchini noodles were cold, I took them out of the fridge and mixed them in the sauce, and tasted. A little bland, but damn, those soft noodles are still crunchy! It works in this dish though. In fact, the reason cucumber is added is to cool the spice down, and add some crunch, but it's crunchy enough between the zucchini and the celery, so I'm leaving the cucumber out for this trial run. Instead I'll throw some leftover red jalapeno on top, which is where I'll get my spice from too!
But it's still kind of, just okay. Bland, I guess, but it's something else. I think it's the lime juice we used to replace the vinegar. It's adding a tropical feel to the dish that isn't in the original Chinese recipe. But it is making it taste a little like Thai food. In fact, let me add some cilantro to it. Now I'll top it with the red jalapeno. Taste...
OMG, it's freakin' GREAT! No, it's not a cold sesame noodle replacement after all! It's actually a replacement for noodles in Thai Peanut Sauce! Like the Thai pasta I love at California Pizza Kitchen! Only I didn't use peanuts! It would be perfect for people with peanut allergies (which many have because peanuts are not supposed to be eaten by humans). AND, I used all organic ingredients, no toxins, chemicals, or pesticides, and NO SALT!!!! It's delicious! I just looked up a few Thai Peanut Sauce recipes on-line, and I pretty much nailed every one, except a lot called for coconut milk. I don't think it needs it, but maybe I'll try some next time. The cilantro makes all the difference, especially combined with the garlic and ginger, a perfect combo for Thai flavor. And the almond butter does not make you miss the peanut butter one bit! It's still nutty, rich and creamy! The tea adds some smokiness, but you can't really taste it, yet, maybe I do, because it's delicious, and I'm not missing the soy sauce at all! I think next time I'll either let the tea steep longer, or I'll add a third tea bag. Okay, that sounded dirty. Here, get your minds out of the gutter, you filthy bastards, and take a look at how it came out.
Could be a little darker in color and less soupy, so maybe next time add more almond butter and darken the tea, whatever gets the job done. The spirooli cuts the noodles really long too, so it's fun to eat as well as delicious! This sauce would go great on chicken too! Or in a salad dressing. I mean, it REALLY tastes like Thai Peanut Sauce! Maybe even crush some organic almonds and throw them on top for even more texture. Of course, the name "peanut sauce" doesn't really work, we need a new name. Thai Almond Butter Sauce? Thai "No-Peanut" Sauce? Needs work.
You see what happens when you experiment, you go looking for one thing, and you wind up finding something else wonderful (hence our title, Brainiacs)! In the meantime, this is just small breakthrough in the caveman re-creation of soy sauce. I'm going to experiment even more, and I'll start making more and more Asian dishes using that black gold (I know, my second Beverly Hillbillies reference, stop keeping track). Can Shrimp Lo Mein be far behind? Methinks not. I told you the spirooli changed everything! How many times would I have pasta (or noodles) during a week if it wasn't bad for me? Answer: practically every single friggin' day! I'm officially in my Pasta Period. Picasso had a Blue Period, where he worked very heavy in blue colors, and I'm going to work very heavy in pastas for while. Lasagna and rigatoni coming soon (rigatoni, are you mad?). But I've been craving fried chicken wings lately, so I might make those before the next pasta experiment. Plus, I always love a good burger, and I've also been craving egg salad. Hmm, all these choices on paleo. Who says dieting means deprivation? Whoops, sorry Christina (christinadoeslife.com), it's not a diet, it's a lifestyle! Ugga-Bugga!
Ramen Redux!
Ah, it's good to get back on the healthy horse again! After three weeks of NY food bliss, I have been craving REAL food again. If I ever thought there'd come a day when a Brooklyn Boy like me would actually utter the words, "I'm so sick of pizza," I would have had myself committed long ago. It's just a reassurance that I AM committed, to the caveman/paleo diet, chemical free organic food, and a healthy lifestyle.
Came home from NY late Wednesday night to a completely empty fridge and pantry, so continued non-caveman eating through Friday to add insult to injury. Basically what it came down to is I'm a lazy bastard. I'll say this for paleo, it takes some energy to cook EVERYTHING, and sometimes I just don't have it in me. But I still wasn't worried, I didn't do the caveman diet for over 40 years, and in the first 3 months of doing it, I felt better than ever, so I knew I'd feel that way again in a week or so of returning to my cave.
I spent all day yesterday shopping. First the farmers market to get some nuts for bread making (and bread crumbs), jalapenos to add spice back into my life (I loved cooking for Sherilyn and Lorin, but I'm a spice nut, and they eat VERY bland for my tastes) and fruit and veggies that are in season. They have those delicata squash for only $1 a pound, so I got a ton for future mock sweet potato fries (if you're lost, do a search on my blog for Sherilyn, or delicata, find out what the hell I'm talking about, and stop being such a lazy bastard)! Then I went to Trader Joe's for eggs, and whatever else I could find to make my ramen soup again (look. it. up.). Then I went to Whole Foods to get whatever I couldn't get at Trader Joe's (who by far have the best prices, although their selection on organics is limited compared to Whole Paycheck, um, I mean Whole Foods). It feels so good to have caveman food in the house again. Part of making paleo easy for yourself is keeping organic, non-processed food in the house, so that when I'm hungry, it's right there for me, ready to devour. Otherwise, you have to first go to the store, then put away the groceries, then prep the meal, then cook the meal, then eat the meal, then clean up the mess. I'm exhausted just writing about it. It's a lot easier (and harder to make excuses) when you're hungry, look in the fridge, and take out some healthy leftovers, or a carrot, or make a quick salad (another tip is to make your favorite salad dressings in advance and keep them around in the fridge so you're not making it from scratch every single time), or a beautiful orange, or an apple with almond butter, or coconut butter spread on a piece of rosemary walnut bread, or... the list of yummy healthy snacks goes on for infinity, as long as you have them around in the house, because I know I'm not the only lazy bastard out there, so make life easy on yourself if you're going paleo, and SHOP! Those green bags from AS SEEN ON TV are great for making organic produce last for weeks, so you don't have to shop every other day either, but only once a week, like "normal" people (are the paleo eaters normal, or is everyone else? Good argument for the cavemen I think).
You see ladies, this is what guys really talk about. You think it's all, "Ugga-Bugga, football, ribs, baseball, steak, hardware store, burger, fantasy league, beer, porn, snore, fart, sleep." But in actuality it's, "Ugga-Bugga, grocery shopping, Whole Foods, produce, Bed Bath & Beyond, Spirooli, Green Bags, coconut shrimp with an apricot dipping sauce, porn, snore, fart, sleep (some things are universal)."
So I made my soup again, and this time, loaded up on the red jalapeno, and freshly grated ginger! Wow, my mouth was on fire the whole night, but it was wonderful. And of course I made my zucchini noodles. The more I eat them, the more I realize they can take some cooking, and remain al dente, not getting mushy at all. And softening them up by cooking (in whatever broth or sauce you're using at the time) definitely makes them more noodle-like! Take a look:
Mmm... Soup IS good food! And for dessert, I had a persimmon, which is in season right now. I had my first persimmon earlier this year (among the many other first time foods I've tried since going caveman), and I really liked it, but this one was different. Last time I only saw these little tomato shaped persimmons, but these were rather big, look:
It was sweet and pretty, but a bit chalky for my taste, but hey, you live and learn! I'm gonna have leftover soup for awhile, but then I'm gonna tackle one of my all time favorite dishes, cold sesame noodles! If I can convert that to caveman, I need to be sainted. Saint Fat Bastard? Hmm, doesn't have quite the same ring as the other saints. Saint Caveman? Saint Ugga-Bugga? I'll keep working on the noodles, you keep working on the name.
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